Gone, Baby, Gone

[countpuckula]

Still high on the Sectionals win, Puck was in a great mood the next day when he strolled into Shelby’s apartment building. Their little fight was in the past now, and he was ready to look to the future... though if that future happened to hold some awesome make-up sex then who was he to argue?

Whistling “Man in the Mirror” as he took the stairs two at a time, he stopped just outside her door to smooth back his mohawk and hide the bouquet of flowers he’d gotten her (possibly by illegally picking them from someone’s garden on the way) behind his back, he raised his hand and knocked. Even the knocking sounded jaunty.

Today was his day, he could just feel it. Everything was finally looking up, and there was nothing that could bring him down.

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[countpuckula]

He was determined to just walk away and never look back, and he even made it out into the hallway before Shelby’s words stopped him. Clenching his hands into fist, his back still to her, he squeezed his eyes tightly closed and lowered his head.

What did she know about last memories? He’d had his father walk out on him, he knew what it could do to a kid. It was something he had never gotten over, but it had been different for him. His father had been around at first, and Puck had had to watch his parent’s marriage deteriorate, had had to listen to all the insults that were thrown at his mother, his sister and himself.

“You’re the one doing this to her, not me,” he said coldly. Every cry that Beth made pierced through his heart until he could feel tears burning in his own eyes. He wanted so badly to comfort her, to take her in his arms and tell her he would always be there for her, that he would never leave her... but it was all lies. He knew how this thing worked. For a few months, maybe even a year or two he would visit and he would see his baby girl, but each and every time it would get more difficult to leave her until the day when Shelby finally found someone to be with her and help raise Beth. Then where would that leave Puck? Beth would have a new daddy, one who was always around and her her mommy loved, and Puck would just be in the way.

No, he couldn’t do that. It was all or nothing, and Shelby’s words confirmed which one it was. ‘The last memory’, she said. She had already decided.

For one moment he looked back, and just seeing the tears streaming down his sweet, innocent daughter’s face tore him apart. Turning away again quickly he shook his head.

“She’s too young to remember me now,” he said before forcing his feet to move forward again. It was his last memory of her that was going to be the problem.